This is my deeply loved son, Seamus Raven, on June 23, his fourteenth birthday. The moon was almost full. We were on our way home from the ocean and dinner when we stopped here to look at the moon over the Great Bay. The other day it dawned on me that there were all these things that Seamus no longer did this past year. They were things that were a part of his life, and my life, every day and now they are...not: Being gently woken up in the middle of the night to have a cuddle for a few minutes before he goes back to sleep, playing with his cars and his little action figure guys, creating amazing Leggos structures and my favorite of all the childhood years; playing dress up all day long every day of his life; miraculously, a new outfit was made each and every time out of the same magical trunk of dress-up clothes and accessories! He was sitting across from me when I realized all of this. I cried. He smiled his loving, compassionate wise smiles at me. "I'd still play dress-up when it rains!"
He loves going outside in the rain dressed up like a warrior or some mythic character from his beautiful imagination.
OK, no one will believe this unless you know me and know that I would never make things up! Just this very SECOND Seamus called me, "Mom, Mom..." in a muffled voice. I turned around to see what was going on. I knew it was the "Mom, Look," voice. And there was Seamus, I swear to GOD, dressed up! He loomed over me at almost 6 feet tall with his giant, black, winter, down jacket zipped all the way up with the hood on but in place of his face was a green balloon (from his birthday party) with a face drawn on it with goggles on it.
I said, "Seamus, you are not going to believe this! I can't believe this! I am just writing here that you no longer play dress up!
And he said, "Yeah, I was just thinking that to myself as I put this on, "Oh cool, I'm dressing up!"
We are so connected!
We are so connected!
I jumped up and hugged him and kissed him and squished his cheeks and said, "Thank you, Thank you! I love you!" a million times...